Setting Your Boundaries  #

Let's start with the most important thing: boundaries.

Most films and actors never have problems with intimate scenes, but occasionally actors find themselves feeling vulnerable because they're asked to do something outside their comfort zone.

To avoid awkward situations, you need to know where your boundaries are.

There are two types to consider: external boundaries (from the country and culture you're in) and personal boundaries (what you're willing to do as an actor).

External Boundaries #

Different countries have very different standards for what can be shown on screen. What's perfectly normal in European films might be completely forbidden elsewhere.

One actor told us about working on a Bollywood film:

If you're filming internationally, be aware things may be very different from how it is back home!

Personal Boundaries #

Even more important are your own personal limits. Every actor is different. One might be happy kissing passionately but uncomfortable taking their top off. Another might happily do a shower scene naked, but feel uncomfortable cuddling up to someone of the same gender.

What about you? What are you comfortable doing? How far will you go and still feel completely at ease?

It's important to think about these things now before you're actually in the situation.

So take some time out right now to think about these scenarios and give yourself honest answers:

I am comfortable…

• appearing in swimwear/underwear/topless/fully naked
• kissing without tongues
• kissing with tongues
• mild romantic scenes
• stronger physical scenes
• full intimate scenes
• same-sex and opposite-sex scenes

Write your answers down. This gives you clarity and helps settle things in your mind. Then, when you find a scene which asks you for these situations, you are not sent into a frenzy trying to decide if you want to do it or not.

PS, if you are ever panicked by something you are asked to do, then perhaps you shouldn't do it!

Remember: no one is judging you. This is your decision alone. 

And there are no right or wrong answers. There is just your answer.

In other words, never let anyone pressure you into doing something you're not comfortable with.